I’m encouraged that my church just released their long-awaited and controversial material on women and the priesthood. For too long, Mormon women have whispered about the fact our foremothers held a stronger institutional claim on the priesthood than we do today. However, as a feminist and heritage Mormon I am disappointed that these essays on Mormon women’s history–our history–include with the facts an authoritarian interpretation of those events that further keep women in their place. I wish the material contained less spin, less direct appeals to authority to enforce the status quo, so Mormon women could more freely judge our own history for ourselves.
I’ll never forget the first time I read Women and Authority, the book that led to Mormon feminist Maxine Hanks’ 1993 excommunication–especially how Zina Young (plural wife to Joseph Smith and Brigham Young) and many others performed the same rituals I’d only ever seen men perform all my life. When I read it, pregnant with my second child, I laid the book on my belly, stared out the window in shock, and cried. That shock dissipated as I excitedly visualized what it would look like today if we reclaimed that authority once taken away, instead of deferring to the current customs of male-only participation church ordinances.
Reading about my foremothers sparked my interest in asking my priesthood leaders if I could simply hold my newborn baby and participate in her naming and blessing ceremony–the devastating denial of which launched my activism. I used my own body to demonstrate our desire for equality because I love Mormonism and my people. I wanted a more equitable future for my sisters and daughters.
Now, thanks to details that the LDS church has publicly released, we can discuss our history more openly. This is definitely a step forward and a move I celebrate–that said, as a psychologist specializing in Mormon women’s mental health, I would be negligent if I didn’t acknowledge how these new essays frame Mormon women’s history within clearly drawn conclusions meant to enforce obedience, appealing to authority to reinforce the patriarchal status quo. I don’t believe this is a healthy pattern to disseminate information, particularly for female members who are taught from a young age to accept benevolent sexism, be obedient, and defer to church teachings on traditional gender roles–sometimes at the expense of their inner voice.
Mormon founder Joseph Smith said the Relief Society (not just in the temple, but open in public) would be “a kingdom of priests,” and repeatedly used the word “ordained” to describe the authority he gave to women (many were his plural wives). These women used the same word to claim their authority when more patriarchal leaders threatened it after Smith’s death. It’s the same language we use today to describe boys and men receiving the priesthood: now a rite of passage for all males 12 and up. But the Church asserts in the essay “ordained” must have meant something lesser or different, simply because women are the recipients. As a matter of conscience, I cannot accept this argument. Also, admitting women used to give healing blessings (by laying on of hands and annointing), but we don’t now because it’s something that just the men should do (and quoting the church handbook barring this practice) is an appeal to authority I’m not comfortable with given the fact women in our history used to do what the handbook says we cannot.
Church leaders have every right to present their own materials however they please. However, I believe people like me who question the now-official interpretation provided in this essay have a moral obligation to heed their conscience rather than feel compelled to defer to authority. This is particularly relevant for Mormon parents and teachers, who are helping shape the minds of the church’s youth relative to these issues. I have discussed this elsewhere with regard to the polygamy essay/seminary manual, where I’m seeing a similar pattern of obedience-heavy tones to satisfy moral dilemmas. Critical thinking is paramount to adult moral development, and we need to teach the rising generation (particularly our young women) to trust their inner compass.
Our young women learn that patriarchy is God’s will for them. We sustain all-male centralized leadership as prophets, and all-male bishops as judges in Israel who have the right to judge our worthiness over personal measuring and counsel us. All boys, fathers, and husbands are taught God wants them to preside in the home. While women lead church women’s and children’s organizations, in all positions they are supervised by a male authority with veto power over their every decision. Thus, according to the new essay, women exercise priesthood authority (but not office or ordination) when they follow the counsel of their priesthood leader and/or serve under him.
In our weekly church practice, girls and women receive the same message. Every Sunday, we observe all males leading worship meetings and boys blessing and distributing the Lord’s supper. The cumulative message behind these day-to-day experiences is that men run the church, and we should trust them over our own intuition about equality. We see this hegemonic reinforcement in the newly released essay, culminating when the essay quoted the church handbook (which contradicts our own history).
While I do not agree with the official interpretation provided by the Church, my intent here is not to persuade to my view of historical events, but rather to make space for other women and Mormons in a faith transition/awakening who may similarly have questions. It’s up to every individual reading this to follow their own moral compass. If you agree with the Church’s interpretation, that’s great. If you find your inner voice leading you to a different conclusion, that should be fine, too. Sadly, that is not always the case, as women who publicly question the church’s official narratives and practices have often experienced shunning and discipline.
I would urge everyone to read all the original sources footnoted by the Church, study and meditate on all the material, and draw their own individual conclusions about women, authority, and equality. And don’t give up hope: each congregant sharing their authentic truth with another is–I believe–the key to Mormon mental health (current Mormons, transitioning Mormons, post-Mormons). As scary as that sounds, putting your authentic self out there makes all the difference. It’s time to speak up: listen to your inner voice and follow it.
Dr. Kristy Money received her Ph.D. in counseling psychology from BYU. She is a psychologist specializing in Mormon women’s mental health and navigating faith transitions/crises for individuals and couples. You can contact her or schedule a consultation here.
Thank you for this encouragement to think, to study, to ponder, and then to come to our own understanding. Women are capable of this, in spite of the limits some in authority might want to put on us.
I pity anyone who needed this essay to realize women can “think, study, ponder, and then to come to (their) own understanding,” as you say. SMH.
Thank you Kristy.
Thank you for this, sister. I especially like the sentence “Critical thinking is paramount to adult moral development, and we need to teach the rising generation (particularly our young women) to trust their inner compass.”
What triggers me (in an overall perfect article) is the quote by Brigham Young. Makes me angry all over again how these things were quoted liberally during my church years, like saying “See? The founding prophets wanted women to have the priesthood!” — like some sort of peace offering, a consolation to women. But seriously — he wanted a woman to be able to fill in for him when he was gone? How about the fact that women actually do most of the childcare? That a woman’s caresses & love and healing touch may actually be stronger than him swooping in & doing a blessing? How about the fact that in all cultures up before America, it was women who held the priesthood and healing powers… Egypt, Greece — women were doing all the healings. It just triggers me (and I own it, it’s just my reaction) how we still use those quotes by JS and BY when even the quotes show such a limited and patriarchal thinking.
But honestly — fantastic article, especially from someone with your training & healing — very much “healing” — work. You have the priesthood, sister. You don’t need anyone to give it to you.
Thanks Maria, it is awfully sad that even in the throes of our feminist longings we have to show “Look, MALE LEADERS LET US DO THIS WAY BACK THEN!” why are we “allowed” and “not allowed” by men to do anything at all? Is this extreme patriarchy eternal? Are we forever going to be presided over? It’s the scariest question to any Mormon woman, I think.
The key concept advanced by the essay is that although LDS women cannot be ordained to the priesthood or hold priesthood office, they nevertheless exercise priesthood authority whenever they do what their priesthood authorities tell them to do. Thus, for example, when a LDS Stake President tells the Stake Relief Society President to prepare and provide dinner to visiting General Authorities, she and her fellow sisters in the Gospel are exercising priesthood authority when they carry out their priesthood authority’s orders. In this way, LDS men and women are equal in that they both exercise priesthood authority, though they carry out different responsibilities.
(At the risk of stating the obvious, this comment is satire.)
sad, but true unfortunately
I love the last 2 comments so much!
I’m just going to throw this out there- bit if you want to say a healing prayer over your children (or whomever).. Why don’t you just do it? If you don’t have the “priesthood”- who cares? The results are most likely the same. It’s like arguing who gets to have a superpower.
I hope women who, after reading the history for themselves and coming to their own personal conclusions want to bless their children, do so without fear or shame. It is unfortunate this still can’t be done publicly or in church without real fear of discipline, but at this point, I’m all for women doing blessings if they want to, like their foremothers did. It could be a spiritual tradition they start for their family, or themselves. I’m not here to persuade someone to do it, it’s up to them, but if they want to, I imagine it would be an empowering experience.
[…] Kristy’s Essay: Psychologist’s Response to Women and Priesthood essay […]
The more I learn about energy healing, and as I practice Kundalini Yoga and Meditation, the more I come to understand that all humans, whether they have been given the Priesthood by those in authority or not, have power to heal. It is a spiritual gift, unlimited to race, gender, age, class or membership. All can qualify.
In all honesty, I firmly believe that I have all the powers, abilities and responsibilities as my husband. All of them. He was given the priesthood in this life, but I was given the priestesshood in the pre-earth life. This is my personal belief and not doctrine, obvs.
Absolutely, sister. Absolutely. We have it even more, it seems — more intuitively, more without questioning, more instinctively.
I actually really like that thought! You (males) received the priesthood in this life, but I was born with it. 🙂 Thanks for sharing!
These seem kinda like the “Women and men are equal except where women are better” lines of reasoning that I hear all-too-often these days. While I’m interested in the idea of how men and women differ in intuitive possession of heavenly gifts and authority, I hope you recognize the ironic sexism of your stance. I’m certainly open to correction, though, if I’ve misread your meaning.
I long felt that women were trusted from birth with their element of priesthood in this life, in the form of the capacity to bear children. Men, on the other hand, have to prove themselves worthy of their portion of priesthood.
Before you get offended, let me say that the capacity to bring forth life is something that modern women increasingly overlook. It’s treated as mundane and uninteresting, valued in its moments of glory but otherwise a bother and a burden. There are two problems with this: First, some men (like myself) lament the fact that we can never give birth. It seems like God cheated us in some way, denying us that opportunity, while women have essentially the same opportunities men have in every other respect (barring social forces that limit women, that is). Second, having the priesthood isn’t a patriarchal license. It can easily become mundane and uninteresting, and the responsibilities associated (including the worthiness aspect) can seem burdensome. It takes dedication to value the priesthood rather than just to *have* it.
Now, I want to be clear that I’m not saying that women shouldn’t have the priesthood. I frankly don’t care whether they do or not, and I would fully support any petition requesting modern investigation into this subject, including the leadership purposefully seeking revelation, not merely an essay about past practices. I also support the idea of an informed body of saints who actively engage with leadership about the substance and interpretation of doctrine, rather than blithely submitting to authority.
My concern is mostly with the attitudes people have about this subject. There’s a lot of dissatisfaction with the idea of male-female differences (though few would consider the opportunities women uniquely have to be deific or doctrinal sexism). There’s quite a bit of certitude that the leadership must be wrong. An interesting question is, supposing the leadership *did* pursue specific knowledge about this subject and received revelation, would women dissatisfied with the current church stance accept the revelation?
D., I appreciate that you clearly put thought and effort into your response. I agree that I am not a fan of sexism applied in any direction.
I strongly disagree with the common comparison and equivalency between birthing and the priesthood. First and foremost, about 5% of women are infertile. Those numbers are increasing. This doesn’t mean that they cannot still choose to be mothers, it does mean that womanhood and childbirth are not one in the same. And it also serves to illustrate the fallacy that mothers are more significant to their children because they gave birth to them. It ignores the millions of adoptees that have joined a new family and parents who love them.
And worst of all, I feel the comparison reduces the value and role of a loving, caring, and nurturing father. Children benefit most when parents are aware, involved, and attend to their children’s needs. Regardless of gender. Placing the vast burden of childcare on mothers is not only unfair to mom, it’s a disservice to children. Two parents are still going to struggle to always attend to every need of their child. So it always kills me when I hear leadership undercut the value of dads. A good father isn’t simply a breadwinning-priesthood-rolemodel. He’s a man who does his best for himself, his spouse, and his children. Constantly taking away fathers from small children, under the justification of a mans calling and a mother’s role, is damaging to the family. Just as it’s damaging to take away mom.
The priesthood and motherhood are not two sides of the same coin. That would be fatherhood and motherhood. The priesthood is something that can be earned, which gives authority and power over others (regardless of whether it is being exercised righteously or not). Parenting is a completely different sphere, and it’s not limited to one gender. And seeing how birthing is not earned, but an ability a woman either has or hasn’t, and a woman and man have equal opportunity to influence their children (depending on the choices they make), the false equivalency deteriorates.
I was raped by a fellow member, and due to related complications, developed an infection that required a hysterectomy. I cannot have any children, but I wanted to. While recovering from my assault, my bishop became involved, and I experienced severe ecclesiastical abuse under him and my SP. Despite evidence and a confession from my rapist, they wanted me to confess and repent for seducing a ‘good man’. This happened years ago, while attending a church university. Throughout my horrific experience, all I could think, was ‘Would another women do this to me? Would another woman doubt me for being unable to successfully fight off a full grown man? Would a woman ignore me, When I told them I was afraid to even be alone in a room with a man? Would a woman force me to recount explicit details, despite the documented danger of doing so without proper psychological training?’. I was threatened with discipline and expulsion, and was forced through an interrogation process that ultimately lead to me developing severe PTSD. I’ve been able to finally forgive my rapist, but I still have nightmares over what my leaders did to me, in the darkest time of my life.
My reports were fruitless, I have no female leaders to appeal too. I wasn’t allowed to speak with a female leaders, despite having been recently raped and being incredibly fearful of men. These men presumed themselves to have the spiritual discernment to ‘know’ I was lying, and seemed to believe i was a danger to other men on campus. And when they were confronted with evidence of the truth, they basically said ‘well, better safe than sorry!’, and I still received a written warning.
I had an abusive mother. It was damaging. But I was able to leave her, and she has no claim to how I choose to live my life. We can choose our family. But my options in the church are: silently accept the abuse you receive, leave, or speak out and be smattered and kicked out. No one responded to my attempted reports of my previous leaders, except to council me about sustaining priesthood leadership and respecting the priesthood. I’ve had one good and sympathetic bishop, and he wept when I shared what happened. But it didn’t change how powerless I am and how unrepresented I am in my faith. Motherhood can’t change that I am a subject and an object in my faith community, without even authority on herself.
[…] that’s offered four times per year (non-renewable). It basically requires that you submit an essay, which gets evaluated based on need and ambition. If you’re wondering where to apply for it, […]
The older I get, the more I believe that being ordained to the priesthood is what makes men equal with women.
As a whole, women instinctually and intuitively recognize and serve others. We give so much of ourselves with so little thought. Evolution honed us to preserve our species, to attend to and protect our offspring and each other — even at the cost of our own well-being. Men, on the other hand, were honed to focus on tasks that insured their own survival, like acquiring food and competing for resources.
If the purpose of the priesthood is to bless the lives of others, to provide and care for someone besides yourself, then it makes sense that this “gift” would be given to those who would spiritually benefit from a charge to think less frequently of only themselves. For real-world Mormon women already striving to fulfill the priesthood’s admonishment, ordination may serve only as a burdensome reminder of the never-ending demands placed on us and the impossible standards to which we hold ourselves.
Perhaps there is such institutionally-sanctioned resistance to the notion of equal ordination because it would lead to inequality in the division of labor. I suspect that if the responsibilities to direct and run the affairs of the Church were given to both men and women, women would step up to take on duties where we see men falling short. Men would feel relieved of their responsibilities, and naturally revert to a self-contained/centered state. Their opportunities for spiritual and emotional growth would be shuffled off.
Regardless of the reasons for today’s men-only ordination, I feel in my heart like I already inherently have priesthood power. In times of distress, I have reflexively laid my hands on loved ones and prayed for their healing with all the energy of my soul. I know that God valued those prayers as much as he would have valued an official priesthood blessing given by men. Perhaps even more so because my sense of helplessness drove me to a place of utter humility and desperate faith. There was no trust in my own power, only trust that the love that I had for those in peril and the love that God had for me would be enough for him to hear me and help them.
I know that our heavenly parents love their sons and daughters equally, and want to give us an equal chance to progress. If they give one set of their children a gift necessary for exhalation, but don’t give it to the other set, it stands to reason that the other set of children doesn’t need that gift. They already have that godliness within them.
Ladies, I would like to ask you a question then. I have my own opinions and like everyone elses they only matter to me, so ill keep them to myself and let them develop as they will based on information and inspiration. If this organization is so obviously corrupt and being led by men who are obviously not inspired, why do you stay within the damning confines of a an oppressive religion. Isn’t it obvious that God is not with these people. You argue for something that they obviously don’t have to give you. Why not go out and find the truth of religion. You have admitted that your church leaders are wrong. If they are wrong and they are leading your church then your church is wrong. Why do you stay? Take your scriptures and take your children and teach them truth. If you continue to send them to church to learn but then you have to explain to them that only some of the things they learn are true and right then they will eventually leave the organization anyway.
Kristy Money, you are ashamed of your church. You aren’t trying to persuade anyone because if you did you could come under condemnation. Why would you choose to live with that kind of fear. Is that what you think God wants for you.
S. those in authority want to limit you. Why would you subject yourself to someone who sees so little potential in you?
Maria P. You said the author has the priesthood and that she doesn’t need anyone to give it to her. If that is so then what more can you possibly get from a closed minded and limited religion. You are angry ( Makes me angry all over again how these things were quoted liberally during my church years,) at the church. Why not live without that anger and leave it for something positive and real.
Scoopy, you live with fear of eternity, and all because you choose to believe the latest lies that your leaders have thrown at you. Why not leave it all behind and be happy.
Pat Riarch, you see right through their BS, and it is laughable. Why have you not already moved on when faced with an organization tat is so transparently corrupt and wrong.
Ladies, why do you believe that uninspired men can lead an inspired religion?
Let’s not make assumptions. I have long left the Church. However, as you know, humans are tribal creatures. Many of the people dearest to me, and to us, are in the Church. Several commenters probably live in Utah. Leaving the Church is doable. Leaving Mormons, however, is often impossible, because of family bonds. Not quite so easy, you see? 😉
Also — and most important — truth is everywhere, including in the LDS Church. Seeking connections, agreement, respect, common ground, is one of the most valuable human traits. We seek honest & fair discussion. Those are moral values our society needs. Leaving the Church is one thing. Talking about it, because it’s still part of our life to various degrees, is noble. Even though it seems black and white, and easy, to you.
You’ve made so many assumptions here that it’s a bit hard to engage with your post. I’ve left the Church. But as I would imagine you know, many of us have long family history and current family who are members.
I happen to be single, so leaving was easy for me. But for several posters it may be possible to leave the Mormon Church, but impossible to leave Mormons — if they are their husband, mother, father, brother, sister. We are a human tribe, and we are entrenched in each other’s belief systems, want it or not. It’s not easy to leave everyone behind, along with your newly dawned realizations. Please be careful before you assume anything about anyone, and before you imply that leaving Mormonism behind should ever be easy or fast.
I feel so sorry for the feminists in the church who feel so sorry for themselves and so marginalized because their secular world demands equality in all things. Somehow everyone seems to have missed the point in the essay that the superior natural spirituality of women makes it nigh onto unnecessary that they be directly ordained to priesthood office. After all, if one remembers a couple of things, it should not matter, except to those who have accepted the conventional wisdom” of the secular world that women must ve equal in all ways with men. Of course this is physically impossible, given our physical differences. That is obvious. However more important issues should govern our understanding that “equality” in mortality is negligible when one remembers the eternal scheme.
First, in this fifteen minutes called mortality, what if the priesthood WERE available, but not afterward? Priesthood is a responsibility, not a career track. I suspect that the reason most women want the priesthood is that they have been made to feel excluded from the prestige that goes with doing an official PUBLIC priesthood ordinance, i.e. as Jesus put it, “to be seen of men.”
I don’t think there is much respect given to the priesthood obligation of service if the thought in the back of the holder’s mind is, “Look at me! I’m up here with the men!” To think of priesthood ordination as a measure of equality in this world is to succumb to the envy created by the adversary.
Dear God, what is it to stand in the naming circle after you have done the most important thing that any mortal can do for another, and that is to provide the means for one of your spirit siblings to come to earth, to carry this fleshly being within your body until it is mature enough to emerge and live and then to remain the most important fellow mortal in that creature’s life?
The second thing is to remember that when you are in the temple, you are washed and anointed to become queens and priestesses in the next world. In other words, your men cannot exercise the full priesthood in the eternities without your part. You are integral in the exercise of this eternal priesthood. So what does this fifteen minutes mater except to the most impatient. So remember that envy is a vice (one of the seven deadly ones), while patience is a virtue
Were it up to m, I would say take the priesthood, and gladly hand it over to you. I have had it, along with the joys AND the burdens it implies, for 60 years of my life. In those years, I have resented having to pass the sacrament or other “chores,” I have trembled in fear of my inadequacy and my unworthiness when called upon to exercise it on behalf of my family or home teaching families or friends. I still fear being called to a significant priesthood position, even as a counselor to a bishop. Yet I already have served in such a position, in addition to being elders’ quorum president and high priests’ group leader. I hate the spotlight because I am generally a private person except with my most intimate friends, including my wife, who has no desire to be ordained, despite her own feminist leanings and her experiences in the corporate world and business ownership before her conversion. She has competed successfully in that world and feels no need to compete in the spiritual one because she has reached that understanding by her own study and prayer and personal revelation. I have not given her anything but respect for the life she has created for herself. I always gave her the personal space she needed to develop spiritually on her own without my lobbying for a particular outcome. I only tried to answer when asked
I learned this lesson as I developed a love for the sole church position I cane to love. Teaching Gospel Essentials and Gospel Doctrine, neither of which require priesthood ordination, but only authorization by a priesthood leader. These callings forced me to study and pray mightily so as not to mislead the students and to gain insights that I needed to tell them what the Lord wanted them, and me, to understand.
I hope that you, too, will understand your enormous spiritual power, even without ordination and then realize that secular feminism is a distraction from what the eternities can hold for you if you are patient and don’t think of getting the priesthood in the same manner as breaking some worldly barrier. They are in no way the same. Don’t be deceived.
It is the consequences of non-representation and zero authority that are harmful, not a failed desire to have power over others. Women are denied authority even within their own families, and it is ultimately up to those above them whether they treat them with respect or not. It is a powerless and tenuous position to be in for a lifetime.
I was raped by a fellow member. While recovering from my assault, my bishop became involved, and I experienced severe ecclesiastical abuse under him and my SP. Despite evidence and a confession from my rapist, they wanted me to confess and repent for seducing a ‘good man’. This happened years ago, while attending a church university. Throughout my horrific experience, all I could think, was ‘Would another women do this to me? Would another woman doubt me for being unable to successfully fight off a full grown man? Would a woman ignore me, When I told them I was afraid to even be alone in a room with a man? Would a woman force me to recount explicit details, despite the documented danger of doing so without proper psychological training?’. I was threatened with discipline and expulsion, and was forced through an interrogation process that ultimately lead to me developing severe PTSD. I’ve been able to finally forgive my rapist, but I still have nightmares over what my leaders did to me, in the darkest time of my life.
My reports were fruitless, I have no female leaders to appeal too. I wasn’t allowed to speak with a female leaders, despite having been recently raped and being incredibly fearful of men. Despite the much higher likelihood of another woman experiencing and empathizing with sexual assault. These men presumed themselves to have the spiritual discernment to ‘know’ I was lying, and seemed to believe i was a danger to other men on campus. And when they were confronted with evidence of the truth, they basically said ‘well, better safe than sorry!’, and I still received a written warning.
I don’t have grand ideas of being in charge, and my fears of male subjugation arose strictly within the church, not some feminist dogma. I was interrogated and traumatized by men that were unable and unwilling to understand the position of a female rape victim. The church constantly peaches how different men and women are, yet see no reason to consider those differences in needs and contributions of members and leadership. As a woman, my options in the church are: silently accept the abuse I received, leave, or speak out and be smattered and kicked out. No one responded to my attempted reports of my previous leaders, except to council me about sustaining priesthood leadership and respecting the priesthood. I’ve had one good and sympathetic bishop, and he wept when I shared what happened. But it didn’t change how powerless I am and how unrepresented I am in my faith. Motherhood can’t change that I am a subject and an object in my faith community, without even authority on myself.
You clearly have no understanding of why many LDS women feel hurt and saddened by priesthood authority, and it’s key role in leadership participation and representation, if you are reducing it to a lack of individual confidence and worth. My worth isn’t defined by the world. My lack of voice and ease of ecclesiastical abuse is.
This essay is BS and the writers know it. Women TODAY place their hands on their husbands’ heads and bless them. This is done in front of LDS apostles on Sundays at the temple during the second anointing ordinance.
This essay was approved by people who have received the second anointing and have had their own wives perform the laying on of hands on them! Here they had an opportunity to come clean and instead they obfuscate and distort the truth.
Look it up for yourself if you don’t believe me!
I’m sure women feel much better now that this essay has shown them that they can study and think things out for themselves.
The older I get, the more I believe that being ordained to the priesthood is what makes men equal with women.
As a whole, women instinctually and intuitively recognize and serve others. We give so much of ourselves with so little thought. Evolution honed us to preserve our species, to attend to and protect our offspring and each other — even at the cost of our own well-being. Men, on the other hand, were honed to focus on tasks that insured their own survival, like acquiring food and competing for resources.
If the purpose of the priesthood is to bless the lives of others, to provide and care for someone besides yourself, then it makes sense that this “gift” would be given to those who would spiritually benefit from a charge to think less frequently of only themselves. For real-world Mormon women already striving to fulfill the priesthood’s admonishment, ordination may serve only as a burdensome reminder of the never-ending demands placed on us and the impossible standards to which we hold ourselves.
Perhaps there is such institutionally-sanctioned resistance to the notion of equal ordination because it would lead to inequality in the division of labor. I suspect that if the responsibilities to direct and run the affairs of the Church were given to both men and women, women would step up to take on duties where we see men falling short. Men would feel relieved of their responsibilities, and naturally revert to a self-contained/centered state. Their opportunities for spiritual and emotional growth would be shuffled off.
Regardless of the reasons for today’s men-only ordination, I feel in my heart like I already inherently have priesthood power. In times of distress, I have reflexively laid my hands on loved ones and prayed for their healing with all the energy of my soul. I believe that God valued those prayers as much as he would have valued an official priesthood blessing given by men. Perhaps even more so because my sense of helplessness drove me to a place of utter humility and desperate faith. There was no trust in my own power, only trust that the love that I had for those in peril and the love that God had for me would be enough for him to hear me and help them.
I believe that our heavenly parents love their sons and daughters equally, and want to give us an equal chance to progress. If they give one set of their children a gift necessary for exhalation, but don’t give it to the other set, it stands to reason that the other set of children doesn’t need that gift. They already have that godliness within them.
“I don’t believe this is a healthy pattern to disseminate information, particularly for female members who are taught from a young age to accept benevolent sexism, be obedient, and defer to church teachings on traditional gender roles–sometimes at the expense of their inner voice. ”
I agree that this is very, very unhealthy. It is very telling of how authoritative these voices of authority happen to be, when they continue to do this and we continue to disagree with them. Reading this comment just gave me an epiphany. I cannot understand why I am still Mormon. That comment embodies what Mormonism expects of me. If Mormonism is true, those men are using their authority from Heavenly Father himself to teach benevolent sexism, obedience, and deference to traditional gender roles….and they are indeed doing it at the expense of our inner voice!
Men pray about this stuff and get confirmation that the words are true; we pray about this stuff and get an answer that says we must fight for change. It doesn’t make any sense, because we have no authority to make any change and this essay proves that, yet again.
How did I not see this before? If church leaders can so effectively color the lived experience of so many people, and it’s all a mistake, they don’t speak for God. And there’s no way to tell when they do. If they do speak for God, and this is what He wants, then He is as terrible as the mortal men we try to blame for these shortcomings.
I’m done!
I think what many people fail to see is that it’s not a change of doctrine that’s in question, but a change in policy. This means that it probably will change again and for very important reasons based on growth of the gospel in the world. Personal revelation has always been taught, but obedience is the sacrifice. Men don’t change the church on a whim, if you believe that then you don’t understand the nature of God or His reasons for skirting obstacles that may stunt the growth of the church. But we can’t see the big picture. What you’re feeling is right, women should be able to do these things, but the timeline is the Lord’s. I’ve never felt that holding the priesthood would make me equal to my husband, but quite the opposite. Him holding the priesthood makes him equal to me. God is no respecter of persons and that is true in policy just as in doctrine. He knows how valiant and caring and giving women are with their resources and how men need a bit more responsibility and obligation to spiritually lead and bless family and others. I’ve served a mission without being given the priesthood, which no man can do without, and I’ve served in positions of leadership where I’ve attended ward councils which again, no man can do without being given the priesthood. So that’s why being “empowered” is the exact opposite of what you should feel when thinking about women holding the priesthood. It’s a bridle, if you will, on the natural man, that brings them closer to Christ through the use of it in charitable service. There are other uses of the priesthood for performing ordinances, but when the call comes for more ordinances to be performed than we’ve ever had, I’m sure the Lord will change Church policy if he sees it fit.
Oh my gosh. The quote about Camilla and Spencer w Kimball got to me! Camilla was my great grandma’s best friend and niece (they were the same age cause like. .. polygamy). President Kimball married my grandparents and my niece is named after camilla.
The thought of one of my relatives and an important woman in my family legacy helping with a blessing touches me more than I can say.
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I believe in equality and I share a fabulously balanced situation with my non-member husband (btw) of nearly 30 years. I sit in sacrament and in no way feel undermined by men serving me. I love it. It seems fine.
It feels respectful for the men in the ward to serve the women and children. I feel perfectly comfortable with it. I even like it and I am not one for having doors held open for me.
Sometimes leadership goes to people’s heads but as far as I can see we all need to be built up (male and female) with kindness and sometimes long suffering.
I like that church members are discussing these misconceptions we hold within our walls and unravelling the intentions of Heavenly parents. We do need to tread carefully and take things slowly in this realm of existence it seems. We do learn slowly here it seems.
Where we are headed, once understood, is marvellous. Where peace and sweet acceptance of loving principles will finally be understood.